And Then

Thoughts Began To Fly

Notes to self

Published by Aakarsh under on Monday, February 03, 2014
One of the greatest regrets I had was quitting (learning) music. In 2008, I enrolled for carnatic violin classes under a AIR artist but soon after I was bed-ridden for 2 months due to a leg injury, I discontinued the classes. I could have resumed after I recovered but I couldn't make time (or rather... I could not sustain my passion levels). But I always envied people who knew music, be it any genre. And I always wanted to learn a music instrument. I wanted to understand the context of the piece composed by the composer, the emotion behind it and of course, the technicalities. 

The years 2012 and 2013 have left a deep impact on me, in terms of life, choices, priorities and things that are beyond our control. I would not say that I came to a realization point... that moment of nirvana (if at all exists) still eludes me and I have stopped looking for it anyway. But as work-life got busier and busier, I began looking for my own space. I used to write something before. I have stopped that. I used to explore a lot of music. I have stopped that. My travels too have become too organized and sanitized that the unplanned adventures in life are now too scarce. The only endeavour through which I began exploring my own self-expression was photography. But then, a busy work-life and an effort to balance out other things like family and social lives, brings in its own limitations. Between all this, I do not know from where the desire to go back to music germinated. But it did. And one fine day, I had to say 'Enough' to myself. I went and enrolled for Piano classes. My heart still lies on violin, but since I do have a fairly expensive keyboard at home, I just wanted to put it to good use. Also, learning a music instrument and learning music is my objective. The choice of instrument is secondary. 

I have attended my 1st Piano class last saturday. Needless to say, it was an experience, to begin to learn something new. I really do not want to commit the same mistake again and this time, I want to give my all to this. I hope I will be able to sustain my passional levels this time, so that I really get to understand music... and play it to express myself. A journey into self discovery this is and I want to go to lands explored and unexplored... in this journey. 

3 comments:

Anonymous said... @ Monday, June 23, 2014 6:04:00 PM

Very lucid expression of the confused mind..I appreciate. 1) about music..its never too late to learn. Music is a form of worship. Especially classical music. Start with basics move on to bhajans and graduate with higher level compisitions. It hardly takes 1 yr..rest follow your heart.

Anonymous said... @ Monday, June 23, 2014 6:08:00 PM

About nirvana. Your efforts are without momentum. Gain speed and mass and result is great momentum and finally hit escape velocity to go beyond gravity ie,mind..

Anonymous said... @ Sunday, July 13, 2014 8:10:00 PM

Hey Akarsh- I can completely relate to the desire to learn a musical instrument. I always have been- for want of a better word- envious of people who express themselves- through music, dance writing blogging. Don't know what stops me though. You have a gift of expressing yrself. U can lay yr soul bare. Please don't stop.

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