i rarely find time to blog(element of guilt)...though the urge is there..but now and then, i revisit some thoughts which make me dust my shelf/book...(in my mind..)..

And then..

Sometimes words don’t sit on paper,
In my mind they move endlessly,
Just like bubbles in space.
Constellating around, they appear to me,
And with my mind, through the bubble-like-words,
I see a world convexed.

Afraid to see it and its stark realities,
I break the bubbles moving, with my pen,
By penning few words on paper.
When all is done, when my poem is done,
The world I see appears normal,
And I close my notebook, contended.

But during night, in a stillness of moment,
They rise again, from my notebook, like bubbles,
And start to constellate again,
In the galaxy of my dreams,
Giving me new nightmares of the world.
Perhaps a nightmare is just a dream convexed.
What to do? Words sometimes just don’t sit on paper,

And I am vexed seeing a world convexed...

YES :

No ridges.. no skies...
Wayward dreams melted in cries...
Life afresh from nothing..
Hopes of future still chasing something...

BUT STILL :

Fantasies play hard and wild..
propositions pushing all the while..
now a man..now a child...
When hopes begin to dry Futile..

And Then :

The world seems new again.
a new me..out in chase...
new clouds..few dreams.. and some rain...
Journey of life...just a Maze..

i am tired seeing my blog..unused...agreed,that the culprit is me! but still...

sometimes i have a feeling that everything will reach a saturation point and then vanish in a jiffy. perhaps the monotonous and mundane routine entraps us so much that one fine day we give u on blogs...but wait! ithink the very purpose of coming up with blogs was o get out of monotonous and mundane routine..well, though not completely..but partly... does itmean that the very cause can become the effect..the result..or the outcome.

i come back to the basic question, why do i blog? i dont know...i know that i write..or rather i used to write..frequently..and thought of putting them on one page..hence blog...but these days i dont find time to even write...before people start knocking it down as a lame excuse, i must justify that i havent been finding time to have nice sleep...i forget my breakfast on the table..i dont find time to get some 'dear' things repaired ( mp3 player, computer..)..and gosh! of all..i now remembe..i am living without music... nothing can be more worse...
but still, there is always a player..playing music...of my choice..that is in my mind..and trust me, what a fantasic music library my mind has (as every human mind.).. i find it amusingfor myself when i can sing out not just the primary-melody but also the interludes, counter melodies..every note...is just stored... and yes there is an ensemble in my mind..
now when this orchestra plays...i lose myself..and people think i am mad..ok..make it crazy..they pity me..somebody tell them that i pity them too...

anyways...this is the most notorious blog of mine...becoz i wote this casually..just to see some bloody update on my page...
shoot me if this nonsense (as it is..) killed ur productive time.